Dec 30, 2011

The Gloves are Fucking OFF

Well, I almost made it to New Years without making another post. I had been thinking about doing a piece about what A has been up to, but I decided to wait and see how that played out first. Otherwise, just note taking here and there, commenting where I felt like it, and musing about how much the "prizes" in the Steam Winter Sale SUCK compared to the Summer Sale, but whaaaaaatever....

Now... I'm kind of upset at myself for doing this. Though I didn't explicitly "promise" back when I was making my big spill about not talking about the subject anymore, it had been my intention. And I've been doing a really good job I think, at the very least, not even mentioning her fucking name or commenting on any of the stupid shit I've been seeing related to the subject of her activities. I don't need any more shit dumped on me thanks to her and the fact that we don't get along. I just wanted to stay the fuck out of it, so that was my unspoken promise, to leave it alone... and I really HATE breaking promises. But fuck it. You people are crazy and you obviously need to get slapped in the face a few times, so if I have to take a few punches to try getting that point across then so fucking be it. Consider my offer nullified because I am officially pissed and I have no good excuse to just let it go.

So we're gonna talk about Elaine.

We'll get to why later... but first, a little backstory. See, I don't want you guys to misunderstand. I don't want you to think I hate this bitch for no reason. Okay? Fact of the matter is, I happened to really LIKE Elaine when I first encountered her. Hell, she was one of the first people to comment on my blog. Kinda made me feel special. And hey, what a nice girl she was! Sure, had a few skeleton's in the closet, but so do most people in this mess, so who am I to really judge? I mean look at her! She's working so hard to help people. She's found a way to keep people safe from the Construct. Look at all the people she's protecting. Isn't she just great? An outstanding member of the runner community? I honest and truly had a great deal of respect for her, just like the rest of you did... and some of you, inexplicably, still do.

Hell, I've never even intentionally attacked her. Our first "conflict" was over a freaking miscommunication, which even after I corrected she still insisted upon blowing out of proportion. Since then, we apparently just had a few differences in opinion and she decided to take it reeeeeeeally freaking personally. Like how my offhand comment here, which in retrospect may not have been in the best of tastes, but I was just trying to make a referential point, ended in her sicking her fucking dogs on me. And I felt bad about that, especially during the time I was recovering from my illness and hadn't quite yet gotten around to learning what happened while I was out. Because I didn't want to upset Elaine... I liked Elaine! I was trying my damnedest to pussyfoot around all of these sensitive issues of hers so I could get back on her good side and then...

...Suddenly all of it was justified...

I felt betrayed. Like all of you fucking should have. The bitch had been selling everyone out from the start. Hope was a sham. It was destined to burn. Yet so many of you still supported her after that. What madness is this?? Stop for one second and THINK. For all the people she "saved," for all the people Hope "sheltered," what happy endings did they get? Nearly everyone who's set foot in that place has died. Many occurring the very same week Hope burned. And how did Elaine choose to take responsibility for her actions? She tried to fucking kill herself. To abandon her burden and everything else rather than live with it. What a fucking coward.

And to make things even more fun, she's still ruining lives even without the empty facade of Hope. Went to visit Spencer and crew? And what do you know, The House turned into a month long nightmare, like the House of Leaves on fucking steroids, the worst of it conveniently waiting to come until AFTER she had run away from it, leaving her "friends" to their fate, giving nothing in return but her broken record "I'm so sorry"s on every post the Couriers managed to make.

And then, as if one of her comments to Ember(or Salome I suppose, in this case) wasn't clue enough that they were still bestest buddies, she recently posted outright that she's still hanging with David! Really?? The same David you were selling everyone out to? That you brokered your bullshit deal for Hope with? That David? The David I've heard so much about lately? The one that fucked up Ember a mere week before your happy little pre-holiday get together? And you're just chilling with him like it's totally cool? AND EVERYONE IS OKAY WITH THIS?!?!?

And now, noooow, the coup de grace, David, oh David, my friend, thank you for that revelation. Not that I didn't already suspect it to be the case. I was withholding judgement on the matter purely because I was afraid I was jumping conclusions under the egotistical notion that I was somehow "important," but now that my suspicions are justified I can barely contain myself. That "fucker" who "had it coming?" That was ME!! Huzzah! I feel so fucking special! As if I wasn't justified enough beforehand! I'd been going out of my way to try to think of ways to turn it all around and get back on Elaine's good side, and meanwhile, she was preparing to backstab me and sell me out to David. How fucking Awesome is that shit?? My god, I'm fucking honored! And don't you feel so good about yourself now Elaine? Some poor bastard that wanting nothing more than to make you stop hating him, than honestly wanted you to like him, was tangentially responsible for your whole operation burning to the ground, because you just haaaaaaad take a stab at him and you got caught in the act. You dumb bitch.

So now that I've got a real stake in this, tell you what? Our mutual dislike of each other can step up to the next level. You. Are. My. ENEMY. You fucking PROXY Bitch. You are the Anti-Spiral. Giving everyone you meet false hopes, only so that you can whip them away at the last moment and leave them with Ultimate Despair. I don't care how many "friends" you still have or how many people come after me for railing against you. I am going to hammer away at every stupid fucking thing you do from now on until everyone fucking knows without a shadow of a doubt that you are the most evil person alive.

To Benjamin, I don't know what kind of protections you think you have, but trust me, the moment that bitch leaves, death will come knocking on your door. You'd do well to kill the bitch now. Do yourself and everyone else a huge favor. But mark my words as a damn near guarantee, as soon as she's gone, hell is coming for you, so I hope you're fucking prepared for it.

To Elliot, I don't know how you got to be so fucking genre-blind after everything you've been through, but if you have any ounce of sense left in you at all, you will grab Em, find Richard, and get as far the fuck away from Elaine as humanly possible. She is only going to get you Killed. She didn't rescue you or anyone else from that forest. Your captors knew exactly where she was taking you all. They followed you there. They followed you to The House. They're following you Right Fucking NOW. That bitch is a fucking Proxy GPS Unit you have No Chance so long as you're staying with her. RUN. For the love of god, RUN.

To everyone else, I've said my piece for now. Open Your God Damned Eyes! This bitch doesn't deserve your help or your sympathy. The farther you stay from her the better. She will ruin your life just as she has with everyone else she's come into contact with.

And to those that still support her after all of that? ....Come at me Bro.

Dec 25, 2011

Happy Holidays, Perhaps?

Yeah, so... Merry Christmas and all that jazz... hopefully you're in a position where you can enjoy it. At least a little bit...

Oddly, this wouldn't be the worst holiday season I've ever had... thankful for that much I guess. Or something. Things seem relatively sane here for the moment, so provided my headache ever dies back down, I should be fine.

Anyways, think I'm gonna lie low for a bit and try to take my mind off of things. Need a breather after that mess the other night to get my head straight.

Luckily, I think Steam should be able to keep me busy and occupied for quite a while, provided my wifi holds out. Thank god for Paypal and credit card fraud.

Unless something comes up, I'll see you again sometime after New Years. Will try to have more content prepped by then. In the meantime, stay safe everybody.

Dec 24, 2011

Something Passed Over

...and it wasn’t fucking Santa Claus.

I almost didn’t post about this...
I’ve been sitting here wondering what to even say about it for a few hours now. At first I was just panicking and running about the room trying to decide what to do, if I needed to pack, to run, to wait, what? It just happened so god damned fast that I didn’t know how to respond to it...

Aaaand I am getting way ahead of myself again... Okay, slow down. Spoilers first. It wasn’t the Construct. Again. I’ll try to stop getting your hopes up for activity with false alarms and other crazy shit, but this is just kind of the life we’re living now, isn’t it?

So what the fuck...?

Okay, I’m going to describe this as best I’m able, but it’s not going to be very good because I was too upset over it to really take notes at the time and I’m going by a really shakily recalled memory here... Basically, I’m just chilling out here in the hole, like “normal” or whatever... and I was... I don’t even remember what I was doing anymore, probably reading a blog or thinking about how much I miss pizza or something and then- Fuck.


My cameras outside are always broadcasting. I usually keep the volume low unless I hear birds or something out there and want to listen in for a bit because that’s actually kind of peaceful and relaxing when you’re spending your days in near dead silence all the time and- oooooff topic... Okay! So they’re always broadcasting. I’m not always paying them attention, but they’re on and playing in the background on my laptop... and suddenly there is this noise. It came out as a sharp static burst of sorts at first, grabbing my attention awfully damned quickly. So I click over to the camera feed and just watch, looking for anything. I turned the volume up to see if they were getting anything and- that... that was really a mistake I think.

I started hearing voices.

A freaking LOT of Voices.

They were coming from nowhere. I was looking everywhere, I saw nothing. Nothing was out there. Suddenly there’s like this sharp powerful wind and the trees and bushes and everything starts swaying like there is something huge passing through them, bending unnaturally as some invisible force passed them by. And the voices got louder... and louder... and LOUDER. I could make out the words now. Different tones of voice. They were like mere Whispers yet they echoed louder than the most violent of shouts. And the voices were Cruel. Demeaning. Maniputively insulting. And yet they sounded so sweet as they spoke, like a mother’s gentle caress.

They just kept getting louder, invading my mind and echoing through my brain. My head was pounding. There were too many voices. It was too much at once. I thought my eardrums were going to explode. What the fuck was this?? How was this even happening?!?

And then it was just gone.

Fleeting whispers fading away into the distance and the wind died down and everything returned to normal...

Heh, “normal” ...Right.

And I was out of my chair and freaking the fuck out thinking the Construct had found me and trying to think of some way to keep him out of my head and what the fuck was going on and---

I calmed down eventually... <.<;

It’s taken an awful lot of rationalization, but I think I’ve managed to sort it all out. I think so at least... It didn’t make sense for it to be the Construct. None of it fit his typical modus operandi... but it did fit something else. Now, I can’t be certain because I don’t research this stuff enough, but going purely by what I know... I think The Choir passed over me.

I don’t think it was here for me... It may not have even realized I was here as it passed. I think it was just passing through and I just happened to be in the way. I’m really, really fucking hoping that’s the case at least. In any event, it hasn’t come back.

I’m a little happy about the random coincidence of it though... now I have a pretty good idea of how badly I’m going to freak the fuck out when/if the Construct finally does show up around here. Maybe now I can be better prepared for it...

Dec 22, 2011

In Memoriam

The day was young as the battered and the weary trudged into the clearing on that cold winter morning. Ahead of them the beast stood, tall and imposing, looming above them all as Its empty gaze fell across them in their approach. Minutes passed into hours as more and more of them began to arrive, their numbers vast and incalculable, each as different from the next and yet all assembled for the same purpose, marching towards the same goal, trembling with the same fear...

As the sun rose into the sky, they gathered together, surrounding the living nightmare that their unified presence had summoned to this place. They held no illusions that they had trapped the monster within their circle. They knew all too well that they were the ones caught in the hunter's snare and there was no escape for them. Yet they would not run. They would stand their ground, just this once, and face the monster head on, knowing full well that they would not survive the encounter.

Steadily, their voices began to be heard. A chanting chorus echoing across the field. "For Maduin" "For Beth" "For Lucas" "For Lizzie" "For June" "For Cam" "For Nessa" "For Milo" "For Ray" "For Damien" "For Amelia" "For Luke" "For Logan" "For Sage" "For My Classmates" "For My Family" "For My Friends" "For Everyone" The chanting filled the air, growing louder and louder with each passing second, until suddenly... a hushed still... and a cry of unison, a battle cry, "FOR ZERO!!"

And the earth shook, as the crowd rushed forwards to meet their respective ends. Their minds could not be swayed, their determination could not be broken, they drew forth what petty weapons they possessed and launched themselves into the futile battle. The monster merely looked on as the masses approached, unfazed by their numbers or their cries. Those which opposed Him would fall, just as all the others.

And so it was, as the first man came into range that the monster tore him asunder, thrashing limbs tearing him apart piece by piece until there was nothing left. And yet the people still charged ahead, unblinking, undeterred. The creature continued His assault against the masses, ripping through them like a hot knife through butter, but for every soul He cut down another would take it's place... and another... and another. Endlessly they came, like lambs to the slaughter.

From the back lines, shots rang out. Marksmen carefully aimed to fire their bullets into the beast. Bullets made of Lead, of Iron, of Silver... some coated with Salt, others with Poison... more still with Operator Symbols carved into the heads... anything and everything to stand a chance of penetrating the monster and bringing Him down. But if the shots had fazed It at all, It showed no signs of it, as if the projectiles had never even reached their mark.

On the front lines, they struck with sharpened blades... knives, axes, and swords... they swung with blunt instruments... bats, hammers, and crowbars... yet each blow to land a solid strike drew no blood, produced no damage. Their attacks were as meaningless as they had ever been. Their numbers served them no favor. The creature would never tire, never rest, until It had consumed them all.

Perhaps that is why the creature did not notice until too late that something had pierced His unearthly flesh. A blade, not of iron or of silver or of steel, but of wood... wood that bleeds. The beast paused in His attacks to turn His blank gaze upon the man who had done this, upon the boy who grinned back at Him as he twisted the blade. "Cut from the very branch our hero hangs upon... Our gift to you, from ZERO!!"

With an inhuman screech, the beast tore the reckless Hero apart, drawing out the weapon and smashing it into cinders. It lashed out once more against the foes that surrounded It, tearing them to pieces as they approached... but the tide had already changed. The masses came no longer in reckless abandon, but with a guided purpose. They drove their weapons into the wound, hacking and slashing away with everything they had to give. They had been given a target... a Weak Spot, at long last.

And the beast recoiled... feeling, for once, the very same fear It had so masterfully inflicted upon Its victims. A black ooze bubbled up from the wound, pouring out with a sickly hiss... they were Hurting It. The monster's scream filled the air once more, but this time it was not with a lashing of limbs, but with a flurry of fire that He attacked. The flames igniting the dry grass and setting the field ablaze. The combatants withdrew from the fires, retreating to a safer distance to escape the expanding circle of flames. Within the center, the creature seemed to grow... towering and massive, like they had never seen It before. Its fear induced fury reaching its peak as It prepared to destroy them all in one fell swoop of His might hand.

But the people were not afraid. A glimmer of hope ignited in their eyes as they heard another chorus raise their collective voice. "The flame that purifies all, send this wretched creature back into the fiery pits from whence it came!" And the earth became aglow, a circle of magical inscription carved into the earth and empowered by the blazing fires makes itself known. With a final, resounding cry, the beast attempts to crush the assembly, but He is held secure within the towering pillar of light that shines forth from the battlefield... and in a blinding flash, He is Gone. Nothing remains of the circle but the scorched earth within and the survivors lying without.

There is a silence among the crowd. A shocked awe of disbelief. And then the cheering begins, an overwhelming symphony of laughter and joyous screams. They had done it. They had won. They joined together once more in celebration of their hard fought victory, sharing their memories of the battle and mourning for those who were lost.

They would return to their homes that night, sleeping soundly for the first time in a long, long time... But each of them knew, with no passing uncertainty, that though the battle was won, the War was far from over. They had sealed the creature away for now, but how long the binding would last they dare not guess. A year? A month? A week? It was impossible to tell. They only knew that one day the beast would return and their fight would begin anew...

But they had hope now... For even though the Wound may heal, the Scar would always remain. A reminder to all of them, that the Monster Bleeds. That It CAN be Defeated. That they can Win. Perhaps they themselves may never live to see the day the creature truly falls, but they know now that it is only a matter of Time...

~For Zero

Dec 20, 2011

Bonne Wiley SIGMA

You know, I'm still pissed they canceled Megaman Legends 3. I was looking forward to that... Granted in my present state I probably wouldn't have gotten to play it anyways but... it's the point of the matter.

Anyways, not here to talk about vidya gaymes... that just sounded like a good stupid title to go with the rest of them.

So... Σ

Now, I'm making an big EverymanHYBRID reference with this one, but "Sigma" is essentially a form of... Radiation? That was first detected in a sliver of black "material" found by Dr. Corenthal and delivered to a specialist in... ahh... elemental... stuff. Wow, I forget small details really fast. Point of the matter... the material is believed to be some "part" of the Construct which was left behind during one of his visits. This wouldn't be the first instance of the Construct leaving behind one form of ectoplasm or another, so sounds plausible enough. Anyways, having detected and identified this new form of radiation, dubbed "Sigma," they were able to build a device which could detect the radiation. The EMH boys found this device and inevitably discovered how it worked through... ahh... "unconventional methods of testing." After which they confirmed that each of them had Sigma Radiation in their blood.

So... what is the point I'm getting to with this? Well, whether you believe specifically in the existence of "Sigma" or not, it is still a very viable answer to the question of how the Construct tracks his victims. Previously, I've referred to the concept of the Construct "marking" his victims. I couldn't say how he does it, but the point of the matter is that once marked, it's like you've got an active homing beacon on you. It doesn't matter how far you travel or where you hide, the Construct will find you. Sigma Radiation is simply one means of explaining this. (It's also probably a good explanation for why people in contact with the Construct have a tendency to get sick... You know? Radiation poisoning or something? Meh, topic for another time.)

Also, with this explanation, comes the possibility of a means of evading the Construct. By dampening or outright removing the radiation, the tracking beacon, you could potentially "lose" the Construct and render him unable to track you. However, this assumes that the beacon is something as simple as "radiation" or "pheromones" or some other naturally occurring "thing" which could be used as the beacon. It would require experimentation that I have no means of conducting however... BUT there have been cases of "cures" in the past, so something of this nature does seem possible.

Basically, just so long as the beacon isn't a literal "psychic" mark, then presumably it could be eliminated via some natural means. Your body might even be capable of removing the toxin on it's own over time, provided you were able to evade the Construct for long enough. (Perhaps why/how many young children who were exposed to the Construct were able to escape from him. The infection was not yet strong enough to track before they were moved to a new location outside the Construct's grasp?)

It is still possible however that the beacon is more supernaturally based. I'm leaning towards some form of psychic link, especially given the occasionally touted "hivemind" between Contruct and Proxy theory. Something like that would be a lot harder to remove. Short of being someone really well experienced and learned in that kind of... Activity. And even then it's questionable if such a thing could be removed.

However it works, I do believe that the concept of being "marked" is a sound one. And that once marked you're pretty much screwed. Especially given that prolonged exposure to the Construct likely strengthens the beacon over time. But there is evidence that the mark can be removed. It's just not very easy...

Perspective is Key.

Dec 18, 2011

The Man who would Smite the Gods

Arkady Svidrigailov.

Certainly not the world's greatest role model.

But I noticed something in his story... Something I think people must have missed. Not that missing things is a difficult thing to do when you're observing these things in real time or hastily skimming over them as you try to perform "research" on the Construct. However, as a person with far too much time to sit around analyzing the community's encounters, I've started to notice little things here and there. This is one such observation... and though I don't have the entire logic of how it works figured out, I still think it's important to note.

About midway through his early adventures, Arkady had a run in with Porfiry on a riverbank. He had no problem beating the snot out of the poor proxy, but when the Construct shows up he winds up finding himself in a world of pain just before getting tentacle bitch-slapped into the river. Later an unknown passerby happens to spot him upstream and drag him out of the water, after which he spends the rest of the day dragging himself back to his car and spends quite some time after with serious phantom pain issues. And so that part of the tale ends with very little further examination of the events. Nothing more to see here. Moving along then, right?

But something about this encounter concerns me. There is a very sudden shift in the Construct's behavior here. Something which from a logical standpoint seems out of place when compared against Arkady's previous encounters.

Up until this point, the Construct was always quite clearly "in control" of any given situation. Early on, for all his bravado, Arkady was completely helpless to act against the Construct and was guided along like a puppet on a string. Fear of death held him back from taking the actions he so boldly envisioned in his mind. It was only when he finally accepted the inevitability of his death that he was finally, truly able to begin fighting back. To see his inner ego become more present on the outside...

Still, the Construct remained in control, undeterred by Arkady's sudden awakening. The introduction of Javert at this point is interesting to note however. The Construct's usual methods have failed to bring him his prey, so his tactics take an appropriate turn to whittle away at Arkady's resolve through other means. Still, he forced the Construct to change tactics... control was waning. Only by so much however. As the next few times Arkady has a direct encounter with the Construct, despite becoming emboldened enough to attack it, each assault was met with the same resistance as he had encountered in the past. What I’ve described previously as a Perception Barrier stops him in his tracks, holding him frozen in place for an extended period of time. The Construct accomplishes this feat with ease. Try as he might to strike the creature, Arkady could never get close enough to land a blow. “Layer Three” was in full effect.

Then we reach the confrontation at the river...

Once more Arkady is stopped dead in his tracks, body wracked by intense pain as the Construct exerts its control over him... but then something happens. Something I don't think the Construct was expecting. Arkady Got Back Up. He didn't just crawl to his feet either. Arkady drew his knife, staggered forward, broken into a mad dash, and took a swing right at the Construct's face. And the Construct reacted. It lashed out with a tendril and made violent physical contact with Arkady for the first time. And my question, is Why? Why the sudden escalation from this point forward in the Construct's method of attack?

Perhaps I'm reading too much into it. Perhaps this was just the Construct's way of showing Arkady his place. It was just toying with him after all... It could do whatever it wanted. It was in control.

But I'm beginning to think that's not the case. I think things suddenly escalated, because Arkady had succeeded in making himself a Threat. You see, Arkady shouldn't have gotten back up. The Construct was exerting its control. It had erected the same psychic barrier of defense as it had always used before... That had always Succeeded before... Strengthened it even, to pour on the pain, to make Arkady submit to the agony it was inflicting upon his body... But Arkady somehow managed to resist. He fought through the Construct's control and tried once more to strike it. The barrier was already up... and it wasn't working. Upon realizing this, the Construct had only a few moments to react, so it instinctually defended itself... Making a last second physical strike against Arkady.

From this point forward, the Construct always uses a more drastic form of attack when facing Arkady directly. No more subtle bullshit... Straight to the Fire and the Tentacles every time. (Barring one final instance of what I’d call a maximum power Slendy-Mind-Fuck-Time-Loop-Illusion.)

I'm not exactly sure what it was about Arkady that caused this shift to occur. Was it something to do with his changing perceptions about himself and/or the Construct? Had his Ego simply grown too great to be dominated? Was his renewed determination and resolve simply enough to overcome such forms of mental attack? It's impossible for me to be sure... but whatever the case, I feel it is important that we delve into it. There could be something here that could allow us to finally gain the capacity to slip past the Third Layer, the Construct's most powerful defense against us. He may still have his other methods of attack... his other Layers... but if we can actually get close enough to strike him... then we may finally be able to learn what makes this thing Bleed.

Dec 17, 2011

So You Wanna Punch Out the Construct?

Easier said than done.

I'm not sure if I want to include this post as part of the Slender Man Doctrine, but it kind of fits. I wanted to take a moment to look over the various defenses the thing possesses. Not a specific abilities rundown, but rather just a "This is all the shit you're going to have to go through if you want to hit it." Which is somewhat important because... I don't think it's so much a matter of finding the right weapon to fight the Construct with, so much as it is finding a way to actually CONNECT with said weapon. So here we go...

Firstly, to strike the Construct, you need to consider the base levels of protection that it possesses. I'm going to address these as "Layers," of which there are three.

Layer 1 - The Malleable Body
The Construct is capable of changing it's shape. Twisting, stretching, and contorting itself beyond our feeble imaginations. Becoming taller, elongating his arms and/or legs, growing new limbs from seemingly nowhere. This is a pretty clear indicator of a physical make-up that is more like clay or... jello, than a truly solid substance. As such, I believe it is presumable that the Construct's body could easily absorb and/or deflect any direct attacks, bouncing back from them as though he hadn't even been touched. (Go poke a big slab of jello really hard, you'll see what I mean.) It's even plausible that the Construct could perform a form of rapid self-healing in the event that such a near-liquid body was punctured or cut.

Layer 2 - Tentacle Onslaught
Whenever actually threatened by something, or perhaps just when motivated/annoyed enough to do so, or just for kicks... I don't fucking know... the Construct brings out ye old flailing appendages. These things serve multiple purposes and act as much as an offensive structure as a defensive one. Though I could note that "the Best Defense is a Good Offense" so whatever. These things act primarily as a distraction, they draw the eyes with their constant, rapid movements. This makes it more difficult to maintain your aim when the target's body is constantly obscured and/or moving about. Additionally, they serve the obvious purpose of keeping you from getting anywhere near close enough to attack the first Layer directly. The number seems to vary, though I imagine that the more of a threat you are, the more you're going to see... until there are so many that they're the only thing you can see.

Layer 3 - Perception Barriers
Note the "s," plural. The Constructs greatest weapon is, and has always been, it's ability to affect the mind... through what I assume is some means of psychic activity. There are any number of mannerisms that I've observed through my studies that you might come across. Perhaps one of the more frightening is the ability to make himself invisible to the human eye. This approach is selective, seeming to only work on certain individuals... but regardless, it allows the Construct to hide from you while in plain sight. As in, standing dead center in front of you in a wide open empty space and you still don't see anything.

Another instance is an apparent ability to stop an individual dead in their tracks. Causing the body to simply lock up and be either extremely difficult or damn near impossible to move. There may even have instances in which the Construct has taken control of the victim through use of this version, forcing them to move how he wants them to or perhaps just flinging them bodily across a room without actually touching them.

Yet another is the simple act of creating an actual physical barrier, which would react to those who encounter it and objects that strike it as an invisible wall. They stand as if to say, "You may go This Far, No Further." Effectively rendering any attempt to get near the Construct an effort in futility.

And perhaps the recent favorite is the Loop. Trapping your consciousness in a state of perpetual existence, apparently separated from the real world around you. These vary from the simplistic, in which you find yourself performing the same act repetitively in succession, the same moment occurring over and over again until the chain is broken... to the highly advanced, in which a large area has been isolated from the rest of the world and looped inwards upon itself, creating a perpetual space of nothingness, in which nothing ever changes and time is effectively non-existent. Such loops tend to only occur in extreme or special cases however, likely do to a higher level of effort required in creating and maintaining them. So they aren't the type of thing to expect often, but nonetheless are part of the Constructs arsenal of mindgames which prevent you from actively approaching him.

Lastly, a perceptive element that can be applied on it's own or in conjunction with any of the previously mentioned versions, is the Illusion. Just as the Construct can make himself invisible to your eyes, he seems to be able to make other things just as transparent... and things that aren't there at all, suddenly very real. Another of his most powerful tricks, the Construct's ability to make you see, feel, or otherwise "experience" things that cannot possibly be happening to you. By manipulating your perception, it can make you believe anything it wants you to believe... or at least, it can try to.

Each of these Layers is like a particular stage of a complex boss battle, in which you must find the weakness of each form before you can truly pierce at the heart of the beast. It would likely require a very well coordinated group effort or else one extremely gifted individual, to bypass each layer simultaneously and actually strike a damaging blow against the Construct.

However, it may also be possible to avoid certain layers entirely. The second Layer being the easiest to avoid, but doing so would require catching the Construct off guard. Which may be easier than it sounds. The Construct seems to rely on the third Layer most heavily, typically capable of rendering any foe helpless merely by directing it's gaze in their direction... but if one were capable of overcoming a given Perception Barrier, then one would have the opportunity to lash out at the Construct while it remained unguarded by the second Layer. This strategy is not foolproof, as I shall point out later in a "Case Study" I'm preparing, but it holds potential.

There is also the rare instance in which both the Second and Third Layer are cast aside. Typically in situations where the Construct WANTS you to go running into his open arms. Or maybe he wants someone else to and you just happened to be around at the right moment? Either way, it's a perfect opportunity to strike if you could time it right.

One last thing to consider however. I wouldn't necessarily refer to this as a Layer, but it is an important factor to consider nonetheless when attempting to attack the Construct and bypass the Layers that comprise his defenses. And that thing is SPEED...

For something that stands around not doing a damned thing so often, the Construct is remarkably fast. This should be obvious enough while observing the movement of it's slender appendages, but is not an immediately recognized fact in regards to the speed at which the Construct actually "Moves." This is probably misconception resulting from it's nature as a still fixture, standing in place, silently observing. I hesitate to suggest the Construct is capable of actual teleportation, supposing rather that's it's use of "the Path" accounts for its capacity to cross vast distances in short timespans. However, in regards to close range travel, the Construct is able to reposition himself at rapid speeds, almost the blink of an eye. Though reports of him "walking" are few and far between, there are documented cases which it, and the speed by which he flows across the ground has been noted as alarming. Henceforth, unless the Construct has chosen to fight you standing still, then piercing through each of those Layers is going to become increasingly more difficult.

These observations are not meant to discourage you from opposing the Construct, but rather to inform you of what you're going to be up against so that you may take proper precautions and (hopefully) not do anything stupid. Good Luck... and remember, that "Perception is Key."

Dec 15, 2011

We're the Same, You and I

You know, I think there's a reason I seem to get along with Proxies so well. I think it's because I treat them like human beings and not sub-human scum. (That or they're playing nice so I'll be easier to stab later, but I'm giving them the benefit of a doubt... while not ever taking my eyes off of them.) Too many people nowadays seem to see "Proxy" and immediately designate them as "Enemy." Then the inevitable fighting starts.

I really don't think it has to be that way.

We're all a lot more alike than you think. Right up to, in many cases, being murderous bastards.
I mean, what? You really think that because you're a Runner that makes killing a Proxy okay? That makes it somehow different? No. A Runner killing a Proxy is no different than a Proxy killing a Runner. They're both human. You just killed a Person. A real living breathing person, Just. Like. YOU.

In reality, from my observations, there is no legitimate difference between any of the groups, be they Runner, Fighter, or Proxy. Each of these groups has the Exact Same Goal. "Survival." The only key difference between them is how they go about accomplishing that goal.

Runners survive by, what else? Running. They seek to evade the Construct by keeping out of his reach and trying to stay one step ahead of him at every turn. They search for new means of escape, for new ways of tricking the Construct's vision.

Fighters, on the other hand, are not content to simply evade their fate. They seek to eliminate the Construct and end the game once and for all. They experiment to find potential weaknesses in the Construct, confront the creature in direct combat, or simply attempt to sabotage it's operations by killing his minions.

And Proxies have chosen to lay down their freedoms and Serve the Construct in exchange for their continued survival. It is a sound tactic, in all honesty, but it has the unfortunate side effect of putting them at the mercy of the Construct's whims. And the Construct seems to enjoy seeing watching people get stabbed.

But Proxies are still much more than mindless killing drones. They come in many flavors, as all humans do. Some Proxies are your average Joe, just trying to survive by whatever means necessary. Some Proxies regret the situation they've been dragged into and would do anything to escape from their torment. Some Proxies are intelligent and cunning, plotting grand schemes and adding a theatrical flare to their performances. Some Proxies are batshit insane assholes who go around murdering people without mercy or conscious.

Now stop for just a moment... copy and paste that last paragraph into notepad and do yourself a little Ctrl-H (Find and Replace) work. Just replace the word "Proxies" with "Runners" or "Fighters," then read over it again. See how it still fits? Isn't it funny how that works?

Now, don't get me wrong here, I'm not saying to go out and hug the next Proxy you meet and everything will be better because Hope and Love and Happiness and Rainbows... because they'll probably stab you. All I'm trying to point out is that we're really not so different after all. We're all after the same Goal and we're all Human. We're just having to live with an unfortunate side effect of allegiance that pits us against one another. But at the end of the day, Proxies are not the "Enemy" of the Runners. The Construct Is.

So I guess the long and short of this is... Defend yourself, but Remember who you're fighting against. The Construct is the Enemy. The Proxy is merely a Victim.

Dec 13, 2011

Masked Murderers

Hmm, I'm surprised how the new youtube can be even more ass than the old youtube. But then again, it's youtube, so maybe that shouldn't surprise me. Anyways, between agonizing loading times, I was catching up on some of the vlogs I'd missed updates to or just hadn't watched yet. Between watching those and some other recent occurrences, it sparked a thought a bit deeper than my rambled musings of the other day.

See, there's one thing I've never quite understood. Perhaps one of you could enlighten me, assuming you understand it yourself that is. And by "you" in this instance I mean "you Proxies."

Why do you kill people?

No. Really. This is a serious question. I don't understand it. It doesn't follow in my mind. I'll explain...

So basically, you're working for this parasitic monster that eats people. Sort of. I guess? Maybe he just tears people apart for fun. Whatever. He stalks people and toys with people before finally moving in for the grand old "Snatch and Grab" finale. His whole existence is based around this. Stalking, tormenting, and taking. So why in the high hellish fuck would he want you offing his prey? Breaking his toys? What purpose do his victims serve to him dead? Doesn't that defeat the entire purpose?

I mean, I still see why you're useful... You can track through more conventional means, you understand the human psyche better, and you can see through all the clever ploys we use to fool the Construct. You're a Proxy. A human element which the Construct uses to his advantage to further his goals. A further extension of his many elongated "arms." As such, I can understand why he might use you to stalk, impede, and torment his victims. Perhaps disable them somewhat so that it's harder for them to run. That's all part of the game. But why have you kill? The bastard seems to go to an awful lot of trouble to break victims down enough that he can take them willingly and ALIVE, so why then would he allow you to steal the spotlight from him at the end of the game? Does he even take the dead bodies of those you kill?

But maybe it doesn't matter. Maybe he doesn't need his victims alive. Food is food, right? Still, I have a hard time buying it. I'm inclined to call it an instance of miscommunication between servant and master. With the deranged human Proxy simply taking it upon him/herself and/or their own baser instincts to eliminate a perceived threat. And the Construct just doesn't care. He still gets his food, so what does it matter? Or maybe it's just another one of his games...

I'm still uncertain of the Construct's level of intelligence, but the idea of a predator enslaving other creatures and then forcing them to kill each other for his own amusement is just... the least likely thing in the world for a predator to do. I mean, even WE don't do that... well, okay, not since the age of the Gladiator anyways. But that's still different. We weren't eating the gladiator's who fell in battle. The lions maybe... but... yeah, tangent. Let me back up.

The point of the matter is "Why?" Do you even know why? I mean, I assume a lot of you don't care, but of those that do then certainly you've at least considered the situation. Why does he make you do it? What is he getting out of it?

Dec 12, 2011

Little Observations, while I wait...

I wonder how long I'll really last down here...? It's not like running out of food is my only potential concern.

I wonder how long I can keep my name bolded on this List.

I wonder if anything I say or do will really have an impact, or if I'll just be forgotten... and which outcome will be more beneficial? which more dangerous?

I wonder why everyone wants to be The Riddler? All these puzzles and not a single Batman to solve them. Who are you even trying to impress? you think the Constuct can even comprehend some of our bullshit or do you think it flies right over his head too?

I wonder how many times they can say "Hang in there" or "I'm sorry" to everyone they know before they're crushed under the wait of their helplessness?

I wonder who that "fucker" was that "had it coming?" I hope it was BEN.

I wonder which one of those two are LYING... and which one just can't SEE. I wonder if it matters?

I wonder why he's making the Proxies fight each other... I wonder why the Proxies put up with that shit?

I wonder if I'll ever have to legitimately choose a side? I wonder if I realistically already have...

I wonder if That Man is really coming back... and where his story might take us?

If the Proxies had an Ego Contest, I wonder who would win?

If the Runners had an Ego Contest... wait, is A still alive? Okay, nevermind.

Dec 11, 2011

High Concepts

I've read a lot of Big Theories since I started into this. Most of which are heavily flawed, or don't go far enough into detail, or are way too deep into quantum mechanics for a normal person to wrap their head around. So I'm thinking I should take this opportunity to forge a new Theory based on my own Perspective of things. I'm calling it the SMD Theory... the Slender Man Doctrine. This shall serve as my first actual entry into it.

For starters, the Origin of the Construct.
The Origin of the Construct... Doesn't Matter. Because it's already here. Knowing where it came from isn't going to solve any of our problems. But for simplicities sake, I hold to the theory that the Construct has existed since the beginning of our evolution, right alongside everything else. It is a Parasitic Predator which has survived for centuries and has existed and evolved alongside of Man for as long as anyone will ever remember.

So this brings up an important question. Why haven't we noticed it until now?
Well, I hate to go all "Hollywood" on you, but consider for a moment any given modern series which predominantly features Vampires. Supernatural, Sanctuary, Being Human, the World of Darkness and/or Vampire the Masquerade RPGs... basically anything that isn't Twilight and you're good. How did Vampires survive into the modern age in these series? By hiding in plain sight. By producing movies and tv shows about themselves, full of inconsistencies about just how vampires actually work and how they can be killed. Propaganda... Confuse the public, Protect the species. Meanwhile, higher ranking vampires ascend to high positions of power (Governors, Police Chiefs, Lawyers) within human society and use their position to cover up their brethren's suspicious activity.

Now consider the Construct. Hides in plain sight, often invisible to people passing right in front of him. (Perception Filters I assume, but regardless...) Victim reports are full of inconsistencies, sometimes something works against him, other times it doesn't. And now consider Proxies. Loyal human minions easily capable of working invisibly within human society to cover up their master's dirty work. The religious cults that once ritualistically fed him are merely the tip of the iceberg. Isn't it funny how well organized Proxies are by comparison to the rest of us? That's because they've been doing it longer. Longer, as in, since the dawn of recorded history.

But that isn't to say it has gone completely undetected for centuries. Obviously he had to gain his Proxies somehow. So there's your starting point. People were encountering it and surviving. Fact confirmed. So just as we have Proxies today, we must have also had Runners and Fighters. Turning to Vampire lore again, there is pretty much always a Van Helsing. A Hunter. But either to keep from being locked away as a crazy person or simply to keep their friends and family from becoming involved, these individuals kept their knowledge of and their fight against the Construct a secret. It's entirely possible, that like now, there have even existed communities of Runners that fought collectively against the Construct. The only difference between then and now is that THEY didn't have the internet... and WE do. Communication and distribution of information is much easier in the digital age, as is finding like-minded people willing to believe you.

So I believe that not only has the Construct existed and been active for some time, but also that we've been fighting it for just about as long. The knowledge and history of these facts has simply been carefully buried, either to protect or cover up that knowledge.

I'll pause there for now, since I think I'd have to go on to another topic to continue and I don't want to make this too long of a post. It's a start though... I'll add more entries to the Doctrine as I see fit. Till then...

Dec 9, 2011

Things that go Bump in the Daylight

Well, while we’re touching on things I don’t understand very well and would rather not think about, time to get another goodie out of the way...

Put bluntly, “Monsters Are Real.”

Obviously we’re all good buddy buddies with the Construct by now, so we know he’s out there, staring in our windows at us. So why should it really be all that surprising that there are Other Things out there as well?

I mean, I’ve certainly tried to deny that claim for a while now too. Especially while going over Nicky Sage’s blog. He throws around talk of demons and other worlds like candy at a parade. But given that he’s one of the few people to really take things that far, I like to pretend that he’s crazy and doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

Unfortunately, the more you dig into this mess, the more you have to admit, his stories may hold more weight than most of us would like to imagine.

First there was Zero’s “Bleeding Tree.” Then the unusual creature which appeared in the EverymanHYBRID videos... the uhhh... the “Garden Hoe” right? Isn’t that what Vince called it? And though I could call them proxies, there’s whatever the hell HABIT and the Observer, from EMH and Tribe Twelve respectively, are. The further you dive down the rabbit hole, the creepier it gets. I don’t even want to talk about some of the shit I read about on Joey Steward’s blog.

I don’t think we’ll be able to ignore it all forever. That “Veil” Nick keeps talking about is bound to come down sooner or later. My only hope is that if it does, humanity will finally be able to work together as a united collective to fight these monsters off and reclaim our once peaceful world. That’s being extremely positive on the subject, but best to approach these things in as high spirits as possible, least the news crush you under it’s weight.

I can only really spend so much time researching how to fight these things though, so I’m gonna stay focused on the Construct. One thing at a time. Figure out how to actually kill one monster before you start going after others. I’m mostly just bringing this up to make sure that people are aware of the lurking dangers and to make one minor point that I’ll expand upon later. That being that these things are out there. They’ve ALWAYS been out there. We didn’t “think” them all into existence. They’ve been around for as long as stories about ancient beasts and mythical creatures have existed. Maybe even longer...

...but we’ve survived them for centuries. And we can continue to do so.

Perception is Key.

Dec 7, 2011

Yer a Wizard Harry!



Magick... Magicka... Whatever the fuck it is or you want to call it... er, spell it... by, it’s become something of a mainstay in a few of your more recent Anti-Construct endeavors. So I guess it’s kind of a big deal. Meaning we need to have a little chat about it.

So, can magic be used to defeat the Construct? Ehh... gotta be honest with you. Probably not. I find that prospect to be highly unlikely and I’ll try to explain my reasoning for that better in a bit... BUT... and it’s a great big “But” here... but I think we might still could use it to hurt him. And anything that results in “causing pain and/or damage to the Construct” equals “made of fucking win” in my book. I just don’t think it’s the answer to all of our problems.

In fact, normally I’d be one to just stand up and go “No.” “Stop It.” “Magic does not exist, you idiot, stop trying to pretend that it does.” But then I have to remind myself that we’re dealing with a faceless supernatural creature in a business suit and that just throws a great big monkey wrench into the entire equation. So... okay, maybe magic exists. Certainly there have been a notable few that seem capable of using it rather efficiently. My prime points of reference being good old Nicky Sage and the “late?” Setoth. Both of whom have put a great deal of effort into documenting their magical exploits and both of whom have had others around to back up the claims of “yeah, he just set a bunch of dudes on fire with a wave of his hand.” So kind of hard to argue against at this point.

So, magic exists. I can accept that. Why not? Let’s just go with it. Magic exists. Now what? How does this help us? Well, unfortunately, not a whole freaking lot. Why? Because this stuff is basically limited in practice to those that know enough about it to use it. Meaning they’ve spent a good deal of their lives studying or otherwise devoted to it. It’s a part of who they are. They know what they’re doing. They’ve put a lot of time, effort, and practice into it. Hence why Zero spent weeks futilely trying to get into the “Astral Plane” before giving up, while Setoth was able to just waltz into the place right away like it was no big deal. It’s a simple matter of experience and inclination.

What this basically means is, Yes, there are people like AmalSage who can do magical things and potentially harm the Construct and his minions through utilization of said magical expertise. However, just because he can do it doesn’t mean the rest of us can. I suppose it’s possible we could learn to, given enough time... but good luck doing all of that studying and working in all that astral projection practice while you’re being stalked by a monster who Sees You when you’re sleeping and knows when you’re awake... he knows when you’ve been bad or good so- fuuuuuuuuuuuuck the Construct is Santa Claus!!

Wait- What?? No. Let me back up.

The point of the matter is, don’t get your hopes up. Out of all the runners, we’re probably looking at a good 90 to 98 percent of them/us/you that will never be able to use magic of any kind. We’re looking at a rare select few gifted individuals who happen to have stumbled into the fray with a minor advantage. Because as effective as this magic stuff may be, there are just as many documented instances of it being utterly worthless and ineffectual.

Perception is Key.

And I think that’ll wrap this one up for now. I see no reason to dive further into something I barely understand. I’ll make a longer post when we start talking about killing the Construct with giant robots and space lasers. How about that?

Dec 5, 2011

Clearing the Air...

Assuming you caught my chat with Ms Fractal... I can't say I was really expecting her to show up here. Expect the unexpected I guess...

Anyways, I felt like I responded appropriately at the time, but ever since I woke up this morning I've felt really awkward about the conversation. Something about it just feels wrong and it's bothering me. I guess she got to me more than I realized. Tricky bitch...

The more I think about it, the more I think my major hangup was on the notion that I'm not as sane as I appear to be... and that I'm hiding things. Well, for starters, I really don't think I'm going to start calling my sanity into question at the advice of a woman who's unreliable narrator syndrome knows no bounds. A person who would claim to have been gifted with supernatural powers from an Evil Freaking Tree. For whom "Bipolar" does not even begin to describe. For whom "Psychotic Murderous Bitch" is an understatement. Who's only stated goal is the spread of Anarchy... because yeah, a little more chaos and disorder is really what we need right now, we're not drowning in that already or anything. A person who can't even seem to decide just who the fuck she is. This is the person questioning MY sanity? Ridiculous.

Your little Heath Ledger wannabe act isn't fooling anyone you know? I know what you're trying to do. Problem is you're barking up the wrong tree. I'm not Harvey Dent, I don't have any demons to hide. You caught me by surprise and I let my guard down out of some misguided sense of sympathy for your plight. It won't happen again. I may well not be the most sane man on the planet, but I'm certainly ahead of you by a hop, skip, and a mile.

As for the rest of it. Am I hiding things from people? Am I wearing a mask? Tch... Perhaps you could call it that. I'm certainly withholding information about myself, but I believe we've been over that haven't we? No names, no locations, no dates, no family history, no where did I work, nothing personally identifying. I'm getting along well enough with Proxies, but that doesn't mean I want them carrying around my personal information. I've got one chance of survival out here and I'm not about to go shooting myself in the foot.

I made my last post to try and let people get to know me better. To try and explain where I'm coming from. Did I leave things out? Of course I did! What? What do you want? My life's fucking story? It's not very interesting. Just another sap story in a long line of sap stories that you've all heard before. Why should I be so special?

I just don't really like talking about myself, okay? What I think of myself probably doesn't translate into what others think about me anyways. Like, oh hey! I didn't mention that I'm a judgmental prick! Oh, because you already know that! You figured that one out all on your own. I didn't have to spell it out for you. Do you need me to explain WHY I'm a judgmental prick? Maybe I've just always been a judgmental prick. I'm being one right now aren't I? See? It's just natural.

Good grief, I was just trying to give people a chance to get to know me a little better. Nobody is really talking to me unless I make a big fuss over something. Maybe I'd just like to have a NORMAL conversation with someone for once? Is that so hard? No, no, I must be trying to "manipulate people" so that I can lure them into a deadly trap and stab them to death From My Hole In The Ground. Really??? Uuuggghh!

So, yeah, okay. I'm done with this one. I just... Uuuuugh... Headache. Some of you people are just Such a Headache. I'm done talking about myself, if you want to know something else about me then freaking ASK ME. Otherwise, I'm moving on to topics of actual relevance from here on out. I've wasted enough time on this.

Dec 4, 2011

Everyone Needs a Starting Point

Yup, Blogger hates me more now. Refreshing it doesn't work anymore. I'm going to have to start going back to regular bookmarks.

Anyways, I’m having trouble deciding where to start... I’ve been writing things up for a while now and any particular piece of the equation is of moderate relevance to any given passerby looking for information, but I can only make a post about one thing at a time and... Siiiiigh, lets just not even go back into complaining about “too much data.” I think we’ve covered that... So I think I’m gonna just roulette it, unless something relevant pops up along the way I could use as a “reply” of sorts to... liiiikes I did with Titles and MK-II. That would actually be convenient probably... as controversy seems to get me a lot of attention. Even if it’s mostly “I will punch you in the face” sort of attention... <.<;;

I suppose the best place to realistically start is with myself. I mean, I’ve talked a lot about my situation, but not so much about me. So who the fuck am I and why the fuck should you listen to me? I’m not even a runner, what the fuck do I know? Good Question. Let’s try to answer that.

Now, on the one hand, I’m basically your typical nerd. I’ve always been in to a lot of scifi and fantasy, which would make this situation a lot cooler in retrospect if it weren’t for the whole “going to be killed by a humanoid abomination” part. But at the same time, I’ve always been pretty well grounded in reality. I can tell my fantasy from my real life stuff basically... Or I thought I could... guess I’m not so sure now.

As such, I’ve always sort of believed in the possibility of certain things... ghosts, aliens, and similar such otherworldly things... but I’ve always done so from a skeptical perspective. I’m no die hard paranormal freak. I’m not going to jump at the slightest indication of “something weird” going on. I want hard evidence, damnit. (Which Onewinged was ever so “kind” to deliver to me.)

And I’ve always been fascinated by often overlooked areas of science that promote the possibility of living a more fantasy filled life than the mundane one I lived here on Earth. Space exploration and colonization was probably the biggest thing on my list of interests. It’s part of why I went into engineering... erm, that and I wanted to build giant robots. Because seriously... Mecha. Why do we not have this yet? I mean seriously. Seriously. Mecha. What the fuck does the Construct have against a twenty story tall walking behemoth with dual mounted gatlin cannons? Don’t tell me it’s not plausible! I’m an engineer damnit! I Will Tell You What CAN and Can Not be Built!

I wonder if we had orbital space colonies scattered throughout the Lagrange Points already... if the Construct would be able to reach them? Or if he’d be shit out of luck? Certainly that’s high enough to classify as the pen-ultimate “Get Up High” location, right? Can’t perceive me up here, Bitch! Ha, haaa!

Hmm... seem to be getting off topic though. Kind of. I mean, I guess between this and everything else, my personality must have become pretty apparent, right? Which is to say it flies all over the place I guess... Consistency. Who needs it?

I guess the point of all this though is to explain that, I’m smarter than I generally make myself look. I’m heavy into fantasy, but I know where to draw the line. And I prefer to maintain logical reality based standpoints, even if I stretch it a bit here and there for the sake of theorizing.

I know I’ll never have his reputation, but if I’m going to start laying out thoughts and beliefs about this thing, then I’d rather do it from the kind of perspective Zeke Strahm and perhaps Jay(Sage) [So we’re clear on which “Jay” here.] would take, over the kind of perspective that Robert Sagel would take. Have to stay as closely rooted to reality (as we know it) as possible. The farther into crazy town and/or magic land you reach, the less credible your arguments become because normal people can’t replicate your bullshit. So I’m going to use what sanity I still have to try and spread my “gospel” with an air of reason. There’s probably still be plenty of “hokey mumbo jumbo” popping up in it, but when you’re dealing with supernatural forces that really just can not be helped sometimes.

And just to clear the air about it, though I mention and will defend aspects of it from time to time, I’m not a follower of “Core Theory.” I admire Robert Sagel, but I do believe his High Concepts were flawed. Additionally, I respect those carrying the Title of Sage not because of the Title’s connection to Core Theory or the aspects there of, but because of what the Title of Sage means to Me, from My Perspective (which I’ll get into another day). And more importantly, because those who carry the Title of Sage where highly respectable survivors long before anyone decided to pass the name on to them and would be every bit as deserving of my respect with or without their Title.

So... I guess that’s more or less the kind of thing you should expect from me in the days to come. We’ll see how it goes...

More important topics next time, I swear.

Dec 2, 2011

FYI - Blogger Hates Me

Not that this surprises me. At my current rate of progression, I imagine I'll be carrying the Title of "Lightning Rod of Hate" within a few short weeks time.

It's funny actually. I found myself coming into this mess thinking that it would be rather simple to make friends with all of the other Runners. Instead, I seem to be having a generally better time making friends with the Proxies. Weird how that works out.

Anyways, I was gonna babble on about myself or something for a bit, but I noted some comments and I don't know how well people keep up with those things so I thought I'd just make a new entry and respond to em here where the whole damn world can see it much more easily. And yeah, I'm basically going to wind up ranting here again, but at least I'm being pretty calm about it and hey, Drama! Lets see who I can get pissed off at me today! Wheeeee!!

Sooo... Lemme just copy this over for context,
Spencer:  "All I see is the ramblings of small fry. Elaine's a big girl, Shaun, she can defend herself. Though I suggest you watch it, Gargoyle; rubbing people's noses into the ground tends not to work out for the person doing the rubbing, hm?"

Now, I'll not comment much on that first bit because I promised to shut up about it and I'd like to at least "Pretend" to be a man of my word. I will however note that I do believe most people are strong enough to fight their own battles though. If they needed help, they'd ask for it (probably). So, yeah, sure, Agreed.

To the rest however... ahhh... just feels like you're making a jab at me and I was just stating my mind on something that I'd have thought would have amounted to the most obvious conclusion to come to in regards to such matters. Maybe it's a lack of emotional attachment on my part? I don't know. Whatever. Let me back up and get to the point.

I'm pretty sure that was one of your increasingly famous "Idle Threats" wasn't it Spencer? Watch my mouth, else some people (like, I dunno, you?) are going to take offense and let me have it. It's not the first time you've left me a long comment that basically amounts to "Shut up, Asshole." And I'm just going to be very clear here in saying... "No."

I realize we're all in a tough situation and we should be doing more to work together and not be at one another's throats and yada yada, don't make a bad situation worse... But if I see somebody do something reckless and stupid, no matter who it is, I'm gonna them out on it. I have my own opinions, just like everyone else. If my opinion conflicts with yours, then big deal. We don't see eye to eye. Telling me to step off isn't going to change my mind OR shut me up. There are new people coming into this mess every day and I want any of them that find their way to me to be able to see when something is a Bad Idea. I'm not gonna sugar-coat it with happy thoughts and pretend it wasn't such a big deal. It was a Big Deal and a good half of you are just blowing it off out of emotional attachment. Not smart in my opinion. So I'm gonna say so and hope to god more people believe Me than believe You.

Secondly, who the fuck are you to be making threats of any kind anyways? Yeah, sure, you're some big badass or whatever, but all I ever see you do is TALK. What's your most recent claim to fame, huh? Lets see... Failing to rescue Luke... Failing to rescue the 23 Seconds kids... Failing to rescue Hope... Sorry, have I missed something here? Do I need to read back a bit further? You don't seem to be accomplishing a whole lot that I can see, but you still want to talk really big. It's no wonder all the nastier Proxies are so casual and at ease about taunting you... look at your track recod... you're an Empty Threat. There are Dead People I'm more intimidated by than You.

Talk about wasted potential... slap yourself out of Stupid Town and man up already. You're boring me.

Okay, done with that one. Round two, topic title part.
I wasn't going to bring this up because it's lame and uninterested, but now that you mention that Nick I think it's worth babbling over. You said that Blogger wasn't updating you on my blog posts? Something like that? Yeah, that doesn't surprise me. I'm of the impression that Blogger is either a broken piece of shit or it just hates me specifically.

Like, the first ten or so blogs I followed? I'm pretty sure if you click my profile now you're only gonna see that first set. I've watched several more since then, but it only seems to want to acknowledge that first set. It refuses to change.

On my dashboard, similar story... only shows updates to those first blogs. I have to refresh like a dozen times before it decides to remember I was watching other blogs and show them on the list. Similarly, it says I have 19 followers, but if I click to view them, it switches to the new screen and tells me I have seven and only shows those seven. If I refresh enough times, it will eventually admit that I have 18 and show them. Never the 19th though. If I want to know who that is, then I'll have to wait for someone else to start following me, because that's the only thing that been fixing it(before, it would say 17 and only show 16, 18 and 17, now 19 and 18... it's ridiculous).

So if blogger is say, not posting my most recent update until I make ANOTHER update... then that does not even fucking surprise me. I'm not familiar with this website so maybe that's just some problem it's known for. You tell me. In the meantime I'm going to assume that either it or "something else" is intentionally fucking with me out of some sort of karmic virtual spite.

In regards to the other bit, Nick, I'd just like to say that I don't think you're "completely insane" nor do I believe you are "entirely wrong" about things. Rather I believe you are "somewhat insane" and "hopefully wrong" about things. XD But I'll touch on all that magic business you do a bit later. I've got a few thoughts on the matter, but I think I'll keep it brief because I'm no expert on the type of things that you deal with. I will gladly leave those things in your clearly capable hands. Godspeed, good sir, godspeed.

Dec 1, 2011

Needed a Laugh...

Yeah, still working some stuff out. Should be ready in a couple days... or tomorrow... whenever. In the meantime, thought I’d share this with you. I always thought it was kind of funny, so... maybe you will too. This is transcribed pretty much word for word from Onewinged’s notes.

~June 26, 2010

Had an encounter today. Little different from the norm.

Parents are out of town for a day or two. Going to see a lawyer again. Trying to get the inheritance shit resolved. 3lderly lawyer. Some kind of senile old dumbass. Hasn’t been sending out the right forms.

Sister’s out with friends. So just me and the house. And all the fucking cats.

No biggie though. I can handle it all. Probably better this way. Less chance of involvement. For a day or two at least.

Mom wanted me to water her flowers while she was gone. Has a whole patch of em out back in the fucking treeline leading into the woods. Fun fun, right?

Ran into a skunk out there once doing that shit. Kind of funny actually. She puts food out there for all the dumb animals that come up at night. Just sat there munching away. Not five feet from where I was standing. Pissing water out of a hose. But hey, I don’t bother him, he don’t bother me.

So I’m out there watering these things when I notice something out of the corner of my eye. Black and white. Just sorta... There.

Would’ve probably given my left testicle for another skunk.

So I turn my head and there He is. Just fucking standing there. Not ten feet from me. Nobody else around to see. Just Him and me. Me and Him.


Would have probably been more bothered. Him being so close. Looming over me with that stupid. Dumb. Head. But I guess we’ve been down this road a few too many times before. Barely fucking phased me.

So I turn back to what I was doing. He’s not bothering me, so maybe if I just ignore Him, He’ll kindly fuck off after a while like the skunk did.

Figured it’d be a bad idea to run. Think M said something about that. Running just attracts attention. Confirms you’re aware of His presence. So I just chilled out and rolled with it for a while. Waterin mah flowers. Chillin with Slendy. No big deal. I got this.

But then I had to get a terrible idea. A wonderfully beautifully awful idea. I knew better. I knew better when I thought the same thing with the skunk. But this was different. I knew what the skunk would do to me. But Him?


Fuck Curiosity.

So I tried. Really. I tried. But I couldn’t help myself.

So I do this little slow turn. This little flick of the wrist. And I sprayed down the Slender Man with the fucking water hose.

I remember giggling about that. I remember seeing the water splash over Him. I remember watching the little droplets roll off of His stupid little suit. I don’t think He really liked it though. I’m not sure though.

Because I don’t really remember anything after that.

I just sort of woke up. In what I assume had only been a couple of minutes later. And I was laying about twenty feet from where I’d previously been standing. The water hose just lying in the middle of the lawn, still running water everywhere. Had this tremendous headache. But He was gone when I came around. That much was good at least.

Still dunno how I got over there though. Maybe He reacted and I ran and just didn’t make it very far before He mind-fucked me to dreamland. Maybe He moved me there and I don’t remember it. Or maybe He tentacle bitch-slapped me across the yard. I dunno. Any of the above is plausible I guess.

Finished up the garden and got the fuck back inside. Not trying that again.

Really. Don’t think I’d recommend it for testing. Maybe make note of it though. Find a scapegoat or something. Yeah.