Mar 6, 2012

I'm not sure which part was more unexpected

The following is thereabouts the closest thing to a full report as I can recollect from the event we shall henceforth be dubbing as "Experiment Two" until otherwise noted. These events occurred about two days ago and I'd have related them sooner but I kind of felt the need to relocate myself first, so we made that a priority thing.

So as you may have gleaned from my previous postings, I've been staking out a park recently that I hoped to run some tests in. The idea was to find a place with children and a dense treeline, as that seemed like prime hunting grounds or whatever. Plus, I felt safer so long as I remained within an area of his potential territory in which there were still plenty of people around to hopefully prevent him from taking much public action against me. But mostly I just wanted to try encountering it under conditions in which it was not specifically looking for ME.

So a few days of waiting around and keeping an eye out, and jackpot. He showed. I took note of the location and made plans to return the next day, hoping for a repeat performance. I got one.

Oh, uhh... I guess I should note at some point here that I got myself a hotel for the nights I was in the area, since that becomes relevant later. But mostly that was just so I could store my shit somewhere while I was scouting and not worry about losing anything important if shit went awry... and also so that I could clean myself up a bit and not be wandering around the park looking like a dirty hobo that all the parents would start moving their children away from. I also heard there were potentially nasty storms coming so I didn't want to be sleeping on rooftops during that shit either.

Carrying on...
Day of experiment, I camped out with my testing apparatus and waited for the Construct to show. Kept my eyes shifting back and forth across the treeline for hours. I forgot to check my watch, but just going by the time of day, I think he might have actually turned up about the same time he had the day before. Not entirely sure what to make of that... because I went a few days without seeing him in that same timeframe so... I dunno, speculation for another time.

He was doing thereabouts what you'd expect of him and didn't appear to notice me yet, so I took it upon myself to make my move. So I started walking towards him... no shouting, no acknowledgement other than general eye contact as I bee-lined for him. By the time I got to about... I dunno... somewhere between 10 and 20 feet from it, I stopped. He had definitely taken notice of me by this point and turned his body accordingly to face me. Moment of truth. I raised my weapon, took aim... Fire.

And liquid flew from the Construct's body like a makeshift sprinkler system...

...but that's because the water I was blasting him with was ricocheting off of him just like it would if you were the one I was shooting with a Super Soaker. Because that's what I was doing to him, hitting him with a toy water gun. Because "Water, yaaaaay...."

I held the blast for about 15-20 seconds before letting up. I could have kept up the stream but I wanted to take a moment to observe the reaction before applying another dose of H2O to the Construct's suit. It was about like I'd have imagined based on Onewinged's less scientific attempt... but I did note that the water just seemed to run off of him. None of it appeared to be absorbed by the suit or anything, like you'd expect of actual fabric. It all just kind of ran down him, so that even though there were water droplets trailing down his body, he didn't actually look wet at all. And he hadn't responded to the "attack" yet so... I finished pumping back up, took aim once more and fired another burst.

...I'm not sure at exactly what moment I realized I was in the air. Presumably right before the part where I hit the ground. I'm having trouble recollecting it, but given the evidence, I'm pretty sure he slapped me with "something". Because not long after pulling the trigger I was lying on my back and complaining of a headache... but I'm pretty sure that's just because I landed on my head... in any case, I guess that's the point where things actually got "weird".

So I'm lying there on my back, when suddenly my nice clear view of the sky is intruded upon by a tiny face attached to a tiny body leaning over me from my left side. Or more specifically, some 4-5 year old kid, who was staring down at me as though I had just fallen out of the sky... which I suppose is because I Did. I was expecting him to poke me with a stick at any moment. What I was not expecting was for him to open his tiny little mouth and say, "You shouldn't have done that."

So being me, I responded to this in the most sane and logical manner I could think to react to it in by replying to him with, "I swear to god, if your name is 'Ben' I will fucking End You right here and now."

He scrunched up his face and gave me this weird sort of look, "My name's Davy."

I contemplated this. "Well... the gods of fate have smiled upon you then." and sat myself up to investigate my situation further. The Construct was where I left him, thereabouts. Though I appeared to have placed several additional feet between the two of us than there previously had been. SEVERAL. Additionally, inspection of my gun revealed that the front barrel had been sliced cleanly in two by something... which made be wonder why I was in much better shape by comparison... not that I'm complaining.

"He doesn't like it when you do mean things like that."

I glance to my left again, cocking an eyebrow. "Okay, what are you, some kind of midget Proxy?"

He gave me that confused look again, "What's a Proxy?"

"Oh for fuck's sake..." I climbed to my feet. The bottle that contains the water was still in one piece, so I started unscrewing the container. Kept my eyes darting back and forth between gun, kid, and Construct. Having removed the bottle, I dropped the broken gun and took a tentative step towards the Construct when I hear, "If you're mean, he'll make you disappear like all the others."

"Is that so?" I turned around to look at the kid again. I think I was about to say something else, but that's when I noticed the other kids, all sort of in a group not too far behind the first kid, all looking at me with this blank stare, sort of quizzically, like they were the ones studying me. In retrospect... I don't remember seeing a single parent with any of them. 'Fucking Creepy' would be the understatement of the month.

The kid started to say something else, but that was interrupted by a sputtering noise followed by a yell of irritation. Presumably because I had turned up the bottom and was dumping the contents over the kid's head. I think I thought it would snap him out of it... that assuming there was something to snap him out of. He kicked me in the shin and ran off, the other kids scattering along with him.

There wasn't much water left after that, so I was kinda like, 'Screw it' and put the bottle to my lips and tilted it back. Started to turn back to check on our mutual 'friend' after that and discovered he wasn't way over there where I left him anymore... Instead he was standing directly in front of me, looming overhead like a disgruntled soccer mom. I slowly tilted the bottle back down as it leaned it's head down until it was level with mine.

I swear to god I heard growling.

I felt something in the back of my mind, like... he was about to Say something to me... but then I spit the water out in his face.

I woke up four hours later lying in a dumpster conveniently located outside the hotel I'd been staying at. I still had a headache and not a single piece of my super soaker was anywhere to be found. Given where I found myself, logic insisted that I get the fuck out of there now, but upon further consideration... Fuck It. If he dropped me off here, then clearly he already knew where I was staying. Which meant I was no safer here tonight than I was any of the previous nights and that furthermore, had he wanted to take me he could have done so by now. Or, you know, just a second ago when he was in my face. So, given I'd already paid for the night anyways, I did the dumb thing and stayed the night in the hotel again. Washed up, went to bed, raided the buffet in the morning, and then got the fuck out of dodge. No further problems. So... yeah... that was a thing that happened.

As for results, I... dunno. I feel pretty safe saying that he's not "weak" against water or anything like that. There was nothing to indicate such. At most, the dousing seemed to just really annoy him. Which, hey, that's a plus in my book, but still not really helping. Probably going to require further study of some kind... I'll try to think of something else later.

More concerning discovery was probably just those kids and how they were reacting to it. That kind of disturbed the hell out of me really... but I don't think there was anything I could really do to "fix" that situation. They seemed fine other than the fact they appeared to be of a way too friendly mindset with the Construct. But hey, maybe that's a good thing? I dunno. I'll have to think some more on it...

uhh... more later I guess... that's all for now.


  1. Yeah. Kids like that? Avoid them like the plague. Seriously. That is a very, very bad sign.
    They are not sweet or nice or innocent. Most if not all are probably killers by now. You see any of those kids again, you run.

    1. Well shit. o.O;; Okay, making a very big note of that then.

    2. I'd say you're lucky you weren't stupid enough to try to slap the kid out of it or something. Had you actually hit the kid you might have lost more then a super soaker.

      Also, still hilarious.

    3. *blink* I was under the impression that those kids were marked as victims, actually. If you're of the opinion that you should ignore them to save your own skin, then go right the fuck ahead.


    4. Hey Alana. There's a chance they're marked as victims. There's a bigger chance that they're kids like I was, brainwashed into doing his bidding with a gleeful innocence.
      There are lots of children he claims for his own that he uses to kill and destroy and hide among the population, because no one wants to hurt a child-there are many, many people who would rather let a child kill them than seriously fight back.
      Trust me, I know.

      You see kids like that- ESPECIALLY if, as stonebum mentioned, there's no parents watching them, you run like hell.

  2. Both you and Manic are gloriously insane to be trying this, but hey we learned one major thing about him between the two of you, he's such a bitch about getting baths XD


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