That was also a bad idea

Okay, so I had this bright idea, right? The redlight costume didn't really get me anywhere, but what about a Slender Man costume? Yeah, yeah, EMH did it, but that's just what "supposedly" drew it to them. They didn't keep using it to see how he'd react to the costume directly. And hey, I figure, why not take it a step further?

So I tracked down this store I found online that sells costumes for people to wear while on stilts. All I really needed were some long-ass black pants and the stilts, the rest I picked out elsewhere(they didn't have any business suit costumes anyways). So now I'm walking around as this 8-9 foot tall fucker in a business suit, my head covered in a makeshift white face mask thingie... even got some of those little white gloves to make sure my hands were the right color.

But I didn't want to walk around like this in public, cause there's more than enough shit going around to infect people as it is. So I trekked out with my gear to set out in costume through a big open forest environment. Which is the BEST IDEA, I know... but I figured his own territory was the best place to draw him out in, so into the woods we go. I reiterate, I am aware of the fact that this is the BEST IDEA EVER, so you should not need to point this out to me at any time during the comments.

So guess what happened? As I'm walking around, deep in the forest, dressed as the Construct? Can you guess it? Do you know what I ran into out there?

The Construct? Ha, haaa... no, no, that's the obvious conclusion, try again.

Proxies? Nope! Not quite... though that would have probably been interesting.

A local gathering of The Fears? Le Gasp! Could it be true?? No. No it's not.

A panicked Runner with a gun? Ooo, man, that would have been tough to explain... but no...

Give up?!?

I ran into Bear. A fucking BEAR.

Now, had this been a true slender-shenanigans incident, I would have gladly described every stupid detail of this event to you, in the deluded belief that doing so might help someone figure it out a little better based on how it reacted to me and how I got away from it. But since that isn't the case... Fuck you guys, I am keeping my embarrassing-ass story to myself, thank you. All you need to know is that I'm still alive and I'm only telling you this at all as a simple reminder that "Oh yeah, there are other terrible things in the woods that maybe you should remember to be aware of and only forgot about because there was an eldritch abomination behind you."

For the record however...
-I have a sudden incredible disliking for Bears.
-Bears are not fond of muffins.
-I'm out of muffins.
-Running in stilts through a thick wooded area is difficult as fuck.

That is All.